A girls' point of view

Ryanne or I could not have fully prepared ourselves for the change in social dynamics that we would experience in Palestine - as women. On the surface, we prioritized dressing appropriately, by not showing too much skin - no ankles, no midriff, no cleavage etc. We wore long skirts, scarfs around our waist and shoulders, and we wore long sleeves despite the discomfort in high temperature. In spite of our efforts, we had bread and stones thrown at us on several occasions.

Surrounded by the men in the Music4Music ensemble and the largely male volunteers our contact with women was limited. But what follows highlights the few intimate moments we experienced in our time in Palestine.

In most of the workshops young girls were confident and eager to be equally involved. They showed no hesitation to stand up and conduct or dance for us. We questioned at what age are they no longer allowed to express such confidence. Often their mothers would be very enthusiastic and clapped throughout the whole workshop. We were unshure as to whether this was due to the lack of adult men in this environment. Women seemed in awe and fascinated by both our physical appearance and comfort in being not only in the presence of men, but also working with our western colleagues on an equal level.

The majority of girls appeared to all complete a degree at university. Sadly it seems their graduation is shortly followed by a marriage and a life out of the public domain. This seems to be the only option. Florian questioned whether women didn't realize the extent to which they were oppressed, because they knew of nothing else besides their own culture.
After our first workshop at a University in Nablus two female students came up to us to ask our email addresses. Three days later, when we were in an internet cafe, we spoke to them on MSN and they were both very afraid that we would forget about them. They seemed to really look up to us.

In Salfit we met a volunteer who worked for a christian mission. Whe she joined us for take-away lunch (pita falafel on the streets) we were surprised when she revealed it was the first time for her to eat out on a public street. Later we found out that she was betrothed to a man she had not met. She was determined not to marry a man that has been chosen for her by the mother of her future husband, and is currently undertaking a lawsuit to brake this engagement. This seemed very brave and unique for a woman not to conform to the social expectations of her community. She was putting herself in a very vulnerable situation, perhaps her desire for freedom was greater than her desire for acceptance within the community. As an unmarried and childless woman in her thirties I was regarded as being unlucky. As far as I'm concerned solitude is more desirable than oppression. Or maybe I just haven't found the right man yet!
Not that we were short of marriage proposals from eligable and attractive young Palestinians (counting 10 and up....)

Another aspect of the differences between non-muslim and muslim culture regarding women, is that in public there can never be any displays of affection between men and women. Surprisingly enough, men are really close and intimate as are women, but never mixed.
Most muslim women don't even shake hands with men.
Both of us found it difficult constantly being surrounded by displays of affection which we could not experience, let alone return. At home we are both used to displaying affection to friends, also men. As we became closer to the volunteers it was very difficult not to express ourselves. This was extremely hard every time we had to say goodbye to people who were spending up to 14 hours a day with us.

On the issue of clothing: paraded in shopwindows were revealing western fashions such as short skirts and sleeveless tops. None of which could be seen on any women on the street.
It was revealed to us that before the second Intifada women openly wore this attire and did not feel pressured to wear the headcover. We found out that the only situation where they do wear these fashions is in the privacy of their homes or girl parties.

On the positive side we both feel that our presence in Palestine at least gave women and girls an intimate insight into another existence. They wore the most warm and respectful women,but there was always a sadness in their eyes.
In our last days in Jericho we discovered that the young Palestinian men around us did not have an issue with us behaving and dressing as western women. This became very apparent when we went swimming in the Dead Sea. They appeared to be OK with us wearing bathingsuits, as long as there were no other people around that would hassle us.
They have been gentlemen to us from day one, protecting, guiding and informing us about these difficulties, always willing to translate what people in the streets were shouting at us, or explaining certain cultural assumptions men had about western women.

Both of us hope to explore the dynamics of life for the Palestinian women in greater detail when we return in the future.


Kirrily and Ryanne